Daydreaming

Last year I would have never thought I would say we have been waiting for our referral right now. I thought our daughter would already be home now splashing in the pool with her brothers or playing in the sand at the beach on a summer day. Some dreams are hard to let go of but we all did it, we all just hung on to the rumors and hoped for better days ahead.

Now we are at the 10 month mark and I am wondering how much longer will we have to wait. I know I am probably setting myself up for a big let down, but I keep thinking it might be 2 1/2 months away from seeing my daughter's face. Maybe, just maybe, that will be the case. I just can't imagine it dragging on for another 6 months. I think most of us would be totally insane at that point, I know I would be.

Anyway, those are my thoughts lately. Just when I start to let myself get all in a tizzy about rumors and referrals, my son decides to make my day. I know it is just a simple paper but today, it just lifted my spirits. As we wait in restaurants, doctor's offices, or any other place we have to wait, my sons often want to draw or write. I always keep a spare notepad and pen in my purse for such events. So while we are waiting for dinner at one of our favorite restaurants, my oldest son proceeds to draw this and gives it to me. My friend told me it looked like a girl bat, but to me it was just perfect. My son had drew a picture of me, okay, a picture of the way he sees me. He told me I was his angel and I loved to make things grow. I am a fairly good gardener and I do enjoy that, so part of the picture could be true. The angel part, well, that is a bit of a stretch, but hey, it's my kid and he can draw what he wants to. I hope he always thinks of me this way, but of course he could just be buttering me up for something. Momma ain't no fool! Regardless of the intentions, my son made me realize that I am a lucky person to already be blessed by two amazing sons and I can only hope and dream of being a mom to my sweet daughter.